Wednesday, September 12, 2007

A Time for His Arms to Hold Me

Hello friends,

Have you ever wondered what to do when calamity strikes? Your life goes along peaceably, and then you turn a corner and BOOM! Your life blows up. Someone you love gets terribly sick; divorce is suddenly thrust upon you; the child that you raised with love turns on you like a viper; your health gives out; you grow old and your body becomes weaker. I'm certain that each individual who reads this has experienced one or more of these blows to their life.

So how do we continue? Do we give up? Do we look for our answers in the bottom of a bottle? Do we seek oblivion in a bottle of pills. Or do we simply allow ourselves to be overcome and quietly go insane? What is our next step? Is there a next step? And who do we turn to?

I'm blessed with a wonderful husband and two loving daughters; however it was not always so. I remember the days of loneliness, without a loving voice or hand. And to tell the truth, I still have a day here and there, where I feel overcome by the world and the cares of life. My health becomes more complicated. My children go from one auto-immune disease to another. And I grow old. So where is that pitcher of lemonade, made from all those lemons? Where are all the platitudes that we love to cling to? Whose arms will catch me when the rug is snatched from beneath my feet? There is only One.

Years ago when abuse was heaped upon abuse; when hope was inconceivable; when no one wanted nor understood me; I found my answer. I run into God's arms. He enfolds me with His warmth; His protection; and His love. Are there times when I rail at Him and enumerate my complaints? Of course there are. Like a petulant child I cry "You don't love me! How could you let me suffer?! Why do you leave me alone?!"

That is often when His voice becomes more clear, as I remember the words of the Savior of the world crying from His Cross: "My God! My God! Why hast Thou forsaken me?!!" Then I am reminded that even Jesus had moments when He was so terribly alone, all He could do was cry, "Why." And that is when I feel my Father's breath upon my face. That is when I feel his hand upon my brow. That is when He gathers me into His arms, and He cradles me, with a love that is greater than all my problems, a protection that conquers all my fears.

So, now, as health and family sorrows try to become the focus of my life, I reach for His arms to hold me tight. I can feel Him swing me around, holding me close. I can see only Him.

With love,
Jaye Lewis

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