Friday, April 18, 2008

A Time for Clarity

Hello friends,

I can't believe that it has been over a week since I have written. Much has happened. You see, I will be a woman of 62, next Monday, and along with my known medical problems, I have a few unexplainable medical issues. I faint. And sometimes I can't make up my mind as to whether I should faint or throw up. This has happened twice in the last week.

This terrifies my family. My husband said the other day, that I will be looking fine, feeling fine, talking, laughing...then BOOM! My face turns suddenly gray or green. Then I fall to the ground in a dead faint. My next move is to shout, "I'm going to throw up!" Usually I do both.

These symptoms can mean a lot of things. It could be silent heart disease. It could be small strokes. It could be nothing, and it could be something. I've had doctors who have had differing opinions. One wrote, "Patient claims to have fainting spells. I believe that there is little physically wrong with this lady."

Thanks, Doc. Now that medical science has proven you wrong, I would love to hear what you "believe" today. Sadly, if a woman has symptoms, it's usually a number of things, according to doctors like these:

1. She's hysterical
2. She's having a panic attack
3. It's all in her head

Need I say more? In spite of a tendency to brush away the medical concerns of women, I also have seen this same attitude toward men. It is inexcusable!

I am very blessed to have a compassionate family doctor, who has little or no ego. She is a wonderful doctor, who really keeps up with the newest studies and medications, and she respects me.

Why are some doctors uncaring (yawn), hurried (I have real patients to care for, don't waste my time). Yes, I've had that said to me. Oh, and my all time favorite comment in my medical records from years ago: "This is an obese white woman..." At the time I weighed 134 pounds!

I've been fired by a doctor, who said that my asthma and diabetes were too complicated. Then he told me that diabetics with asthma DIE! Thank you doctor. He was pushing 70, and I had the incredible urge to ask him if he had picked out his cemetery plot. Whew! Finding a good doctor is rough.

Now, changing the subject, I want to go on record, that I am offended by the "bitter" remarks of presidential candidate, Obama.'s been years since I have straddled a rifle while holding my Bible, as I bitterly misjudged people who are different than I. Let me see if I can remember when that was. Oh yes! NEVER!

Is this man for real? Or should he be awarded an Oscar for a stellar performance as someone who cares? If not, I'd like a little clarity here from Mr. Obama. No, I don't live in Pennsylvania, but I do live in a rural area. Many of us are educated as well as conservative. In my family; however we do like straight talk, and we have voted Democratic when we felt that it was good for the country.

So, Senator Obama, why do you think that I worship God because I'm bitter? Is that why you go to church? Why do you think we cling to our guns? Could this be the bitter judgement of us, which you state that we feel towards others?

Here is the bottom line for me. In Matthew 12:34b, Jesus says, "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." So, okay, Mr. Obama, what was in your heart when you judged us? That's all. A little clarity here, and you can drop that defensive attitude, too.

Father in heaven, this is a lesson for all of us. Grant us the grace to speak kindly of others. Heal us of our prejudices, and grant us the grace to keep our mouths shut about people we know nothing about. Give us the grace, Lord, to admit when we are wrong.

With love,
Jaye Lewis

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